meditation

Special holiday offer from Circle+Bloom

Circle+Bloom

If you’d like to enjoy some of Circle+Bloom’s fantastic meditations for fertility then head to their store before December 19th to receive 25% off:

No matter when the holiday spirit strikes you, everyone here at Circle+Bloom wishes you the most peaceful, joyful and restful holiday season this year 2016 with a special 25% coupon. Simply enter coupon code Peace25 at checkout (expires December 19th).

 

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Fertility | Meditation and support program

Circle+Bloom

 

 

Circle + Bloom is a meditation program to help your fertility:

  • Natural fertility
  • IVF and other assisted reproduction
  • Pregnancy and birthing
  • Other women’s health and general health issues like PCOS, sleep and energy

 

The programs help you enter into a relaxed state and contain helpful information and visualisations to help you connect with the physical aspects of your fertility experienced in a calm and empowered way.

 

It may suit you if

You are looking to gain information to feel reassured but feel overwhelmed and stressed every time you read books or articles on the internet, this program will likely suit you really well. It helps you understand issues such as your ovulation cycle through the relaxation state, using breathing and visualisations.

 

It may not suit you if

You have a lot of knowledge already and are looking for a way to tune into a deeper level of pure relaxation without any content about the fertility process. You may prefer a general meditation program (browse on iTunes) or a Three-Principles approach instead, in order to access your own inner state of calm and wisdom.

 

 

 

I do not receive affiliate payments from any recommendations on this site.

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The deep practice of parenting

 

Several hundred years ago, Liu Yuan taught “first cultivate oneself, then go about cultivating others.” In his teaching for the everyday person, Customary Words, he explains why this is the only way it works.

According to the teaching of Sydney Banks, we experience our life from the “inside out”, so our state of mind in the present moment is creating the way we experience those around us.

Here, Dr Laura Markham teaches this essential truth in the practice of parenting – the only way a parent can change their child’s behaviour is to change their own perspective first. Then healing and connection can naturally spread outwards.

 

The following article has been reproduced in full with permission from Dr Laura Markham (see original article here)


 

 

Want To Change Your Child? Start By Regulating Your Own Emotions

“Before I even notice, I’m already 10 steps into reacting with whatever issue is at hand with my kids. When I can remain calm, it certainly helps the situation as opposed to when I get heated up, which only makes things worse. It makes me sad to know that until now, I have not been a good example of emotional regulation at all.  And it’s so disheartening to see my kids doing things that I know they saw us do…..throw something, slam a door….”

Sounds familiar, right?  Regulating our emotions is at the heart of our ability to parent the way we’d like. In fact, it’s at the heart of most of the ways we trip ourselves up, from over-eating to procrastinating to fighting with our partner. It’s just so easy to get hijacked by our emotions and find ourselves already ten steps down the low road.

We often hear that good parents love their children unconditionally, but we all know that no parent always feels loving. So we’re left on our own to figure out how we can restore ourselves to a state of love during the inevitable ups and downs of daily parenting.

This very challenging task — regulating our own emotions so that we can guide our child lovingly rather than indulging in our own tantrum — is fundamental to good parenting.  But it’s not just good for our kids. This inner work also helps us to grow into happier people.

Is it hard? Yes. I think it’s the hardest work any of us will ever do. But it’s completely possible. Here’s the secret.

When you let yourself experience your emotions, they begin to evaporate. So by simply sitting with your upsets — breathing and feeling BUT resisting the urge to act, holding yourself with compassion — you clear out your own unfinished business, whether fear, hurt or grief. Love rushes in.

What about anger?  That’s just a defensive reaction to fear, pain and grief. Once you let yourself feel the more vulnerable emotions under your anger, they’ll evaporate — and so will your anger.

You might even say this process transmutes fear, pain and grief into love, because we’re creating love where there wasn’t love before. Our hearts stretch, and we grow as people, as well as parents.

But what about when your child is misbehaving? Are you supposed to just ignore his bad behavior and go meditate? No, of course not!  Children need parental guidance. But you can’t control or change another person. You can only change yourself, which changes how the other person responds to you. So as you change, your child changes. As we de-excavate our old emotional triggers, we become more effective in guiding our child so that he WANTS to cooperate.

That isn’t just a fancy way of saying that we become willing to tolerate something that we may have yelled about before, although that may be true.  For instance, we may realize that it’s okay for our child to feel angry, and stop reprimanding him for that, even as we teach respectful interaction. Or we may realize that her jacket on the floor isn’t nearly as important as how she treats her sister. Or we may begin to see our child’s strong will as a positive trait, and find better ways to partner with her.  None of these positive responses is possible if we don’t start by managing our own emotions.

But what if your child is stuck in a counter-productive pattern and really does need to change? Your own emotional self-regulation is also the key to helping him.

Here’s why:

1. Children learn emotional regulation from us.  Kids won’t always do what we say, but they will always, eventually, do what we do. If parents indulge in throwing things, slamming doors, and yelling, so will they. If we can stay calm, they learn that it’s not actually an emergency when they get upset, and they learn to calm themselves.

2. The emotional safety we create for our children is exactly what allows them to heal, grow and thrive. Like us, children WANT to feel happy and connected, but sometimes their fear or anger overwhelms them.  Our calm gives them a path back to loving connection. When they feel better, they do better.

3. When we provide a calm “holding environment” for our children, they feel safe enough to experience their emotions, which is what allows those big feelings to evaporate. Kids learn that feelings are just part of being human, and they don’t have to fear them — OR act on them.

4. When children respect us and feel understood by us, they want to follow our lead. They learn that they don’t always get what they want, but they get something better — a parent who understands, even when they say no. So the child becomes more open to our guidance, more likely to follow our rules.

5. Children are sensitive barometers of our moods and tensions. If we have an unresolved issue, we can count on them to subconsciously pick up on it and act out. So very often, when we work on our own issues, we find that our child’s behavior changes–even without our directly addressing it!

6. When we respond differently, so does our child.  Remember, it’s always your child’s action + your response that = the outcome. When we get triggered and react without thinking, we escalate the storm. When we respond more mindfully, we settle the storm, and create more connection. Less drama, more love.

The good news is, even if our children have learned some counter-productive habits, it’s never too late for them to learn to manage themselves emotionally. The key is our role-modeling.

Learning to regulate emotions is a lifelong journey. For today, just start by noticing your own moods and feelings.  When you get upset, resist acting until you’re calm. Just breathe, and shower yourself with compassion, so you can calm down before you act.

Hard? YES! But every time you do this, you’re actually rewiring your brain…and strengthening your ability to stay calmer in the future.

I guarantee you’ll see your child change, too.

 


 

by Dr. Laura Markham, founder of AhaParenting.com and author of
Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How To Stop Yelling and Start Connecting and Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

 

 

 

 

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Finding the extraordinary within the ordinary

 

See article “in-shine” for introduction to Liu Yuan

 

Dr Seidman, founder of Hunyuan Research Institute, has released the first in a series of translations of Liu Yuan’s teachings on the heart method and heaven nature.

Su Yan (Customary Words) is a teaching for the everyday person. Liu Yuan teaches through examples that are familar to people in their daily lives – relationships with parents, studying, loyalty to leadership, raising well-adjusted children and so on. These are issues that we all encounter and, by finding the proper measure in each situation in our daily life, we discover the path to becoming fully human – engaged, connected, committed and supported by the deeper principle – “heaven nature”.

While loyalty to the monarch may have been relevant to the common person several hundred years ago, nowadays we can apply this same principle to our relationship with any authority figures to help us to tune in to the deeper principle and ask ourselves what is the most beneficial action. Other examples in this book are more timeless in nature – how to maintain the right relationship with our parents, children, siblings and peers so that the “kind heart of heaven nature” flows through and supports our daily activities and nutures those around us, including ourselves.

With commentary by Dr Seidman to help the modern reader make the most of the text, this text is a treasure to read and re-read, to contemplate and discover.

E-book available from Gumroad: https://gumroad.com/l/cwords#

Su Yan

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in-shine

 

 

We are taught to always aim to out-shine others – rated and ranked and praised and awarded throughout childhood and schooling, and into the workplace – getting ahead and rising to the top, keeping up with the Joneses and all the rest. And if we can’t outshine then we are left in the shadows.

Think about it, this naturally leads to a feeling of isolation for anyone playing by such rules.

Human happiness is based on connection and trust.

Does it make sense to try to out-shine?

We can turn this around – and aim to “in-shine”. All of us are formed from the same “heaven principle”. Within each person, completely intact and unable to be harmed, is innate wisdom and universal love – connection is something we can never lose, only lose sight of.

When we change our story about the outside world, that it’s something to fear or conquer, and start to appreciate the natural goodness within ourselves and within others, then the world becomes our garden. Weeding and watering, tending and caring, it is a bountiful place for us all to enjoy.

Liu Yuan, philosopher and physician of the Qing dynasty, taught that the universe’s nature is heaven principle, expressing as both stillness and movement. When combined, all things are formed by this dual nature – stillness is the appearance of form and movement is form’s changing nature. Living things have movement, but even non-living things like rocks will change with time. But even though it has this dual expression, heaven principle itself is one – constant, unchanging.

This heaven principle is at the centre of life and when we experience it, it feels vast and gentle, it is kindness, warmth and generosity. Liu Yuan says, “the kind heart of heaven principle”. Upon conception, we are this pure heaven principle of the universe – pure stillness and pure movement – this is the “true nature” of the human being. Liu Yuan taught that by engaging in daily affairs with the proper measure, we can get closer to this “true nature” that is the basis of human life.

What is the proper measure?

Upon birth, we need to connect to material things like food, water, air and other humans, so that our life in the world is supported. To move us towards material things we have the human heart, with desires and aversions, likes and dislikes. If we take steps to support our life, this is proper – enough food, shelter, sleep and so on. Relationships are also essential to human life. If we respect and care for those around us, especially those closest to us, then this is the proper measure in human relationships. When everyone can respect and care for others, this is a world that functions abundantly well.

However, the only person’s respect and care that we can control is our own. So this is where we look within and ask ourselves in each moment, am I doing my best here to act with respect and care. When we can do it, we notice that this allows goodness in others to naturally take place – the heaven principle within each person fostering goodness in the world. Liu Yuan’s expression for this is “first cultivate oneself, then go about cultivating others”. “Cultivating others”, then, is tending the garden of the world.

Sydney Banks teaches something similar, that the formless principle, basis of all things, is universal – this aspect of human reality he called “mind”. Our capacity to experience this is called “consciousness”. What we experience is called “thought”. Our human reality is one principle with these three aspects – everything that is experienced is done so through mind, consciousness and thought.

Feeling is the way that we can understand what quality of thought we are experiencing in any given moment. If I’m feeling at peace, expansive, generous and loving then this is the universal nature of mind – wisdom – creating my experience. If I’m feeling tense, judgemental, bitter, agitated or any other low state then this is an infallible indicator that I’m caught in a personal reaction, personal thinking about the situation.

Good states and not-so-good states move through us all the time, like the weather. If I hold onto a low state and try to “fix” it, or react to things from that low state, then mostly what will happen is I’ll just prolong it, causing more obstructions. On the other hand if I can accept that there’s a low state moving through, a “low pressure cell”, then of its own accord it will eventually pass.

Without noticing it, in the next moment I may feel a little lighter, or even have a moment of clarity – this is the power of wisdom. It is always operating, at a level deeper than the ups and downs. By letting personal thinking just go up and down, because that’s what it’s going to do anyway, and realising that we all have moments of insight where our innate wisdom shows up, naturally and spontaneously, then we can take our moods – and our judgements of the world through those moods – a little less seriously. When we can do this, wisdom has a greater chance to show up.

This universal wisdom is the very core of our nature, every one of us. When we relax our reactions and judgements, then it can shine – like the sun that’s always there, behind the clouds that come and go.

“Out-shining” others means being separate and distant, failing to “out-shine” means being in shadow. “In-shining” with others means seeking this true nature that is within, acknowledging that it’s within everyone. If I can experience my own wisdom then I have compassion for everyone else who is struggling with their personal thinking too. From this compassion naturally comes respect. Understanding how fallible we all are, the natural response is to care.

In the words of Liu Yuan, first cultivate oneself and then help to cultivate others. In-shining, valuing the wisdom within, we see it in others, and it grows. Water and sunshine, weeding and caring, we all tend the garden of life together.

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Basic Qi Workshop Sunday 18 October

 

 

If you’re feeling sluggish, have no energy, suffer from chronic illness, or are keen to try out qigong, this workshop is for you!

The basic workshop serves as an introduction to Tiandi Qigong and provides an ideal starting point for anyone wishing to learn Qigong themselves.  It comprises a brief introduction and demonstration. You will then be taught the four main exercises that comprise this form. The day concludes with a group meditation.

 

Michelle

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Guided by the teacher and combining the power of the group’s energies, the day will also serve as a group healing session.

This form has excellent health and calming the mind benefits.

Once you have completed this course, you can join in group practice on Tuesday nights at Elanora Heights, or Thursday nights at North Sydney.

Time: 10am – 5pm

Venue: 29 Allawah Ave, Elanora Heights, NSW, 2101

Cost: $220 inc GST

Email  michelle@northernbeachesqigong.com.au or call on 0412 960 747

Includes CD and DVD. Please wear comfortable clothing. Food is also provided.

 

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Meditation for natural fertility, IVF and pregnancy

 

Head to the Be Fertile website for meditations to support you on your baby-making journey.

CDs or downloads are available to purchase and there are sample free meditations too.

 

We’ve received a lot of positive feedback from women who’ve found these tracks very supportive and nurturing throughout the stress of conceiving and the anxiety of early pregnancy.

 

BeFertile CD

 

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Pregnancy meditation and mindfulness: free app

 

Visit Mind the Bump for a comprehensive free app to support you and your partner from day 1 of pregnancy all the way through the first 24 months after birth.

 

With information about mindfulness, child development and mindful parenting, as well as many guided meditations on various themes such as acceptance and connecting with the baby, this is a wonderful resource for all expectant parents.

 

Mind the Bump

 

http://www.mindthebump.org.au/

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Join Dr Swami Shankardev Saraswati – western medical doctor, yoga acharya (authority), yoga therapist, author and teacher – for an in-depth workshop on ego and enlightenment.

Dr Swami Shankardev’s blend of western psychotherapy and yoga offers a powerful framework for understanding the human condition.

 

This event is to be held at the Manly Community Centre
12 Wentworth St, Manly NSW 2095
Sunday 20 July
2 – 5pm

TICKETS: $65
EARLY BIRD: $55
(before 4 July). Use promotional code ENLIGHTEN

 

For more information and bookings:

Facebook event page

Manly Yoga website

 

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Qi Gong courses

 

Learn the incredible art of Chinese Qi Gong (“chee goong”).

Qi is often translated as “energy.” Or it is the way that energy forms itself into everything that we can see, feel and experience. Now, from our most advanced science, we know that everything is made from energy.  Somehow, the ancient Daoist practitioners knew this many thousands of years ago!

Learning Qi Gong is one of the most valuable gifts that you can give yourself.

 

 

In Master Zhao’s one-day Basic Workshop, you will learn the fundamentals of Qi Gong, including exercises to clear and strengthen your own Qi. By the end of the day, you will already be able to feel this Qi – it is a wonderful experience to understand how this special practice is within the reach of all of us!

See this page for details – the next Basic Workshop is in early July – book now as places fill quickly:  http://www.tiandiqigong.com.au/id22.html

 

 

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